Wednesday, 28 March 2007

Where did the month go

Okay, so I realized by reading Coach's post that people actually read this thing. Not the people that I originally created it for to keep in touch with but people I like from the internet void. Strange really. So I've been knitting, and ripping because the heel on a sock is always too far out, and then I correct and re knit and then find that nope, I'm still f*(ked. But yeah. So I was not posting in part because I had nothing to show and in part because life has suddenly gotten very crazy. It is end of semester and everything is hitting the fan, including shit. I have a lot due, not a lot of time to do it. I'm having issues managing the stress and stuff and actually forgot, plain out forgot, to go to a class yesterday. Not good, not good. Especially seeing as there are only 4 of us in the class total. I really dislike that class though, but it is almost over. I am counting the days/weeks.

"I don't need sex, grad school fucks me every day..." Really enjoying that quote right now.

I've been going to a naturopath to try managing my depression that way, and it seems to be working. So long as I'm not doing school stuff (major stressor) I can function really well. I'm taking a crap load of vitamins though - I'll take a picture of them the next time I want to procrastinate... I just am having issues likeing what I'm doing right now. And seeing as I pay them to have me do most of it, and they pay me really well to do some of it (TA position) ... well I'm supposed to be liking this time in my life. I had a re-evaluation of what I want to do as a job after school (in like 4.5 years, ugh) and I think I want to stop most of the research part and concentrate on teaching at a small university. As it is, in 1.5 years I will be overeducated for teaching highschool - they won't hire me with a master's degree because they will need to pay me too much. Besides, teenagers are pricks and I couldn't deal with them like Amy Lane does. So small university or college, teaching biology/neuroscience/psychology. But it still means 4.5 years more of school.
I had some really good news the other day - I got a national scholarship - NSERC PGS-M - which means I won't be TAing next year (good because it will free up more time to get my degree completed, bad because I like teaching, good because it will be one less thing to juggle). It is a pretty prestigious award and I am proud of myself when I have time to think about it. Doesn't happen often right now.
I am alive and functioning right now - don't worry about me, perhaps send some good thoughts. I will be back with you within 2-3 weeks, if I'm not well - post on this entry to tell me to post. The comments are automatically forwarded to my inbox.


Susan said...

Hey, congratulations on the scholarship! That's awesome news. Good for you. You deserve to be proud.

And, listen, the greatest myth ever sold is the one stuffed down the throats of the young about how these are the best years of your life, yada, yada, yada. Not. There's plenty you don't have right now that can make life really, really tough and plenty, believe me, PLENTY to look forward to. There are roughly 2 things to miss about your twenties once they're past: your energy and your ability to look good with very little effort.

A good naturopath is a great find. Glad to hear that's working out.

Amy Lane said...

Yeah--definitely congrats on the scholarship!!!! And I'm really glad to see you posting--I've been checking... (but you've been commenting, so I knew you were still out there!!!!)

And everything Coach said? Absolutely true...thirties ROCK-- right now you are crazy busy and it's all about "when I"m..." well, 'when you're' really is everything it's cracked up to be...

(Okay...can I say it? I'll say it, because that 4.5 years is probably just looming like a giant hindenburg...darling, the *sex* over thirty? OMG--puts the 20s to an absolute blush...)